Hey Kerry, so sorry for your loss. As grieving is such an unique and personal experience I feel the best advice i can give you here is to talk to a professional. there are so many support groups and services available a number of which are free. heres one i found online.
Be gentle with yourself and take your time, there is no time frame for grieving. I wish you the very best and am sending you lots of unconditional love and healing xxx
Grief is a process, it takes time and courage. We do have some support group for grief over humanityhealing community.
I can send you some Reiki, to help and facilitate in this process transition.