LIES VS TRUTH

 

The lies for me began when I was very young I still can picture the day vividly in my

 

Mind .

 

It was the summer 1968 I had blonde curly hair and vivid blue eyes that danced with the

 

Water. I sat on a little ledge of our boat house; the sun was shining and shimmering. I

 

had a frilly brown dress on. As I sat I took the hot sand in between my hands and held it

 

and then released it slowly, watching it pile on the surface. I had always been a quiet girl

 

and kept most of my thoughts to myself. Yet that day I for some reason had the power to

 

over come an obstacle. What happened next changed my life forever. A neighbor asked

 

me to check out his ski . I looked up to him as he was an amazing water skier he sat me

 

on his boat, and then we talked about his ski. He then told me to close my eyes.

 

I did and he took my hand and put it on his male area. Then he asked” if he could take my

 

underwear off “I said no that was a powerful statement to make for a young girl  his

 

father came to the door and he let me down off the boat.

 

I ran as fast as my little legs could run up to the golden healing lands and sat on the

 

orange speckled rock. I whispered to the lands this will only stay with you.

 

I told know one or did I have anyone to tell.

 

Our family life on the out side for many to see was the perfect family, yet we had so

 

many issues we were all going through. Lies again! We all were doing what we could

 

with what we had at that time.

 

In my teens I had been raped, and again I told not a soul, I kept it in and just pretended

 

my life was fine. Yet years and years of lies were building up inside of me.

 

When I got married, many thought our marriage was so perfect, yet again we both were

 

lying and it was an emotional roller coaster ride.

 

I left with the kids and then some more issues started to happen, that brought more issues

 

I never talked about up.

 

I thought my daughter was being sexually abused, so I fought to find the answers.

 

no answers came forth, and no proof. They told me to carry on with my life.

 

I thought at the time how could you carry on when tis is eating away at your very core.

 

I became so ill as I was sick that something was happening to my baby girl.

 

That is when I went into the hospital the first time.

 

While there I was not ready for help or to get my lies out.

 

It was not until 2006 I was in the hospital again and this time the Dr. I had, and

 

I am not sure how it all fell in place ,yet he came in my room and he tore me apart.

 

He ripped in to my inner heart and soul. He said “you are very clever Lori, and he said

 

you Have lied to me.” That hurt, as I was so sad I lied to him as I had the highest respect

 

for him. I started to howl and cry the deepest sobs, and I cried out of control, the

 

nurses gathered around, and one tried to comfort me, I told them I need to be left alone.

 

I cried for the longest I had ever cried, as I cried all the lies and hurt I caused ever one.

 

Came tumbling out.

 

I vowed to myself I would try to the best of my knowledge try to tell the truth.

 

Yet again I still was not ready to tell the truth and bad things came my way.

 

I lived for 6 months being without a home because I did not tell the truth or be respectful

 

to others believe you me I have learned we have the right to be respectful and live with

 

dignity with our truth. This goes for the same for other’s as we all have our own truths

 

beliefs we must respect other’s truths and beliefs and live our lives and do the best we

 

can. As I know for certain that living a lie, the lies will come back to haunt you and

 

they will continue to circle and eat at your inner core until you speak your truth.

 

Once you speak your voice your truth with honor and dignity all good comes your way.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Replies to This Discussion

< Always Bows to Truth!>

Thanks for sharing your and for sharing it with us in this SACREDspace!

dZ

Thanks for sharing this sacred space.

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