How do you feel connected with someone? For many, connection is about being seen (noticed), heard (back and forth communication) and being valued (matter).
These days we have devices that make us feel connected; we stare at a small screen; take it…
Added by Shervin Hojat on June 23, 2013 at 9:19pm — No Comments
Have you ever asked yourself “How am I?”
We are many times, mostly out of habit, been asked, “How are you?” Depending on our mood, we may say “Ok” or “not bad” or “good” or ”can be better” or “wonderful” or “bad” or ” terrible”, which are all a judgment of what we feel.
Typically we just say OK or good because we feel this is not a real inquiry or we do not want to talk about whatever is going in our lives, or perhaps we have not paid attention to how we are…Continue
Added by Shervin Hojat on June 9, 2013 at 6:00pm — No Comments
Do you have a mindset that you have to give back as soon as you receive kindness, an object or a complement?
I recall mentioning to a friend that her hair-cut looked nice; she immediately replied that my hair looked good too! This is a simple example that we feel uncomfortable receiving a complement and want to give it back without completely receiving it!
What to do if you are uncomfortable receiving even simple complements? The simplest thing is to pause, allow yourself to…Continue
Added by Shervin Hojat on May 26, 2013 at 6:02pm — No Comments
Over 5.3 million people are diagnosed with dementia in the US and over 24 million worldwide. These numbers may mean nothing to us unless we personally experience the impact this dis-ease has on the people around us.
My mother has symptoms of dementia. One of the most difficult things to do is to stand by while your loved one(s) experience the symptoms of this dis-ease. It is important to step into the shoes of the people who experience this dis-ease and have love and compassion…
I participated in a Family Constellation session based on a method pioneered by Bert Hellinger (http://www2.hellinger.com/en/home/). After a short relaxation and creation of individual intentions, the session started. The facilitator, Phyllis Lejeune, was a gentle soul and created a safe environment to tap deeply into everyone’s emotional body. In a typical constellation, a person who is the most emotionally compelled is invited to select…Continue
Added by Shervin Hojat on April 28, 2013 at 8:16pm — No Comments
Have you ever received a phone call and the person on the other end was so upset it seemed as though something terribly unfortunate had happened? And, after talking and discussing the events/issues, the one who called realized it really was not as bad as he/she thought?
Our ego has a protection mechanism based on fear, mainly the fear of survival. Ego tells us if such and such happens, it will be the end of us! In most cases, the situation may be emotionally intense and difficult to…Continue
Added by Shervin Hojat on April 14, 2013 at 12:23pm — No Comments
What are you feeling today at this moment? Can you name your feelings?
There are at least two ways to avoid ownership of our feelings. One disowns feelings by blaming someone else for creating it (i.e. he ruined my day). The other way is rationalizing it as a mental exercise to avoid feeling the actual feeling. We may lose a pet and have grief associated with it. We may avoid feeling our grief by saying,” he lived a long time” to make it OK not to grieve the situation.
Added by Shervin Hojat on March 31, 2013 at 2:06pm — No Comments
When we experience a feeling (pain, not being loved, not wanted...) and we feel threatened by our feelings we may repress them.
As we heal ourselves emotionally and spiritually, those repressed feelings (memories) will naturally surface to be healed. These repressed and typically unwanted feelings are available to us to be felt in our body and to be acknowledged with enthusiasm (no resistance) which then transmutes into healing energy and love.
We may experience “negative”…Continue
Added by Shervin Hojat on March 17, 2013 at 7:11pm — No Comments
Do you worry if your friends may not like or approve of you? If so, you probably have some reactive charge within you. Perhaps it may be the feeling of a child who does not like disapproval or ridicule and perhaps as a result you are avoiding feeling the childhood feelings again.
Intellectually, we may know that we should not care what other people think about our thoughts, careers or how we express ourselves. However, we may not understand this emotionally!
If we, in the…Continue
Added by Shervin Hojat on March 3, 2013 at 8:49pm — No Comments
One of our greatest needs is to be loved by being heard. With the short attention span and addiction to constant visual and auditory intake, it may be a challenge for many of us to really listen to what our children, spouse, family or friends are saying.
I was at Stanford hospital recently helping my mom go through a needle biopsy. In the recovery room, there were computer screens with writings emphasizing the importance of listening to the patient. The Chinese verb for…Continue
Added by Shervin Hojat on February 17, 2013 at 9:10pm — No Comments
There are times that we travel through the dark night of our soul. There are times that our life events feel upside down, unpredictable and overwhelming.
We may call upon on God, spiritual beings, higher self, friends, family or our spouse/mate for help. Although the sources of help may be different for each of us, the request of the call is the same.
Have you called out to anyone? Why did you choose that person?
Added by Shervin Hojat on February 3, 2013 at 10:48pm — No Comments
Let’ take a look at the people whom we adore and look forward to spending time with. What characteristics do they have in common?
In my experience, the common theme among the people I adore is their unconditional love. They accept me for who I am and honor my free will. They teach by example, not by force or guilt!
Take inventory of the characteristics of the people you adore who have been there for you. Acknowledge those characteristics and integrate them in your daily…Continue
Added by Shervin Hojat on January 20, 2013 at 11:03pm — No Comments
Have you heard of the Chinese man who loved dragons? He drew them, collected their statues, read everything about them. He was considered an expert on dragons. One day, a real dragon wandered by and stuck his head in the window where the man was living. The man ran away from his house and was never heard from again!
Many people assume enlightenment is only a mental process, having a certain shape and form. In reality, enlightenment may not match our mental expectations.…Continue
Added by Shervin Hojat on January 6, 2013 at 1:31pm — No Comments
What are the sources of your joy? Your agitation? Are they small or large in size?
Small joys in life accumulate together to make one’s life alive and thriving. We sometimes ignore small sources of joy and turn our attention to small frustrations and make them big deal. Many times we do not feel and express our joy until a big task is accomplished (graduating, retiring, and getting married). We also may become agitated with small things, that in the big picture are very trivial…Continue
Added by Shervin Hojat on December 23, 2012 at 7:51pm — No Comments
At one of our NOG meetings (Nourishing Our Gifts), I met Carolyn. I was amazed that she had taken it upon herself to greet prisoners when they were released from the prison in Huntsville, Texas. She would meet them at the bus terminal where many of them had no one to meet them while they were trying to get back “home”.
Carolyn indicated that at their release from prison, the prisoners received a little red bag to put their belongings in. Everyone in town who saw the red bag knew…Continue
Added by Shervin Hojat on December 9, 2012 at 10:30pm — No Comments
Do your parents have a talent: writing, singing, painting or music? Do you think you have the same talent and are as good as them? If no, how did you arrive at the conclusion that you are not?
As a kid, I hated drawing and painting. My mom was a great painter and I was expected to get good grades at school, therefore I always asked my mom to draw and paint my art assignments. I always believed that I was not talented until I started painting at the age of fifty.
Added by Shervin Hojat on November 25, 2012 at 4:56pm — No Comments
Have you ever experienced a change of your consciousness? What did you experience and what did you feel?
I had an opportunity to experience Body Electronics which helps one to remember past repressed memories (what we have resisted in our current life or previous lives) and transcend them with love and enthusiasm. The experience was very intense!
I felt peace and calm after experiencing the drama of resisting the pain of remembered memories where I was feeling angry and…Continue
Added by Shervin Hojat on November 11, 2012 at 7:31pm — No Comments
You are constantly defining and re-evaluating who you really are. You may have followed all the rules to success, got an education, got a job, got married and had children and still feel the emptiness within yourself.
You may feel that you are more than what you portray yourself as to the outside world. You may be frustrated at yourself for compromising your soul’s desires to just get along with people, be silent, and “not rock the boat”.
It is important to connect and listen…Continue
Added by Shervin Hojat on October 28, 2012 at 11:55am — No Comments
Our traumas can have a lasting effect on us. We may avoid situations that remind us of an event since the “pain” of remembering (feeling) at one time was too much to bear and we still think it is the case.
It is understandable as a child, that experiencing traumas, we may suppress feelings and the memories of such events to survive. This survival mechanism needs to be dealt with so that we do not run away and react unconsciously to events over and over when there is no danger…Continue
Added by Shervin Hojat on October 14, 2012 at 8:42pm — No Comments
Are you the controlling type? Do you like to think about your experience before actually experiencing it? Do you feel frustrated by your own procrastination of tasks that you know are good for you?
In our journey of self discovery it is important to be persistent, loving and methodical. It is also sometimes important to move forward even if we know our fear to experience something is about avoiding feeling certain emotions. The more we proactively welcome feeling our emotions the…Continue
Added by Shervin Hojat on September 30, 2012 at 6:40pm — No Comments