Do you ever wonder why some people treat you in a way that doesn’t match how you consciously think of yourself, often creating unpleasant or confusing interactions?
It’s hard to understand why others behave the way they do sometimes, but when this becomes a pattern that repeats over time, it’s worth taking a closer look and discern what it’s pointing at—in yourself.
For instance, I could accept that my parents treated me like a child even as I became an adult (I guess all parents tend to do this), but it was baffling when strangers and even friends—some of whom were younger and certainly not wiser than me—spoke to me as if they were teaching me something.
At first I thought it was just the difference between me being an introvert and them extraverts, since extraverts process their thoughts as they talk and may unintentionally appear as 'know-it-alls.' But although this may be an important factor, it didn’t explain the repetitive quality of this dynamic—not until I could see the part I played in it and how I needed to fully embrace my own authority to stop it.
It takes two to tango, as the saying goes, but to be able to change unpleasant dynamics you must recognize the invisible messages you’re sending when you interact with others. No matter how hard you try (and who doesn’t?), you can’t control other people’s behavior or change their personality, but if you comprehend that your life is never separate from you, and your soul is continuously projecting your perception into your reality, then it’s clear that everything you experience reflects aspects of yourself. After all, your life is your own movie.
To change anything on the outside, you first need to transform the internal dynamics between your sense of self and your ‘sense of otherness’: how you perceive yourself as an individual (your sense of self) and how you perceive yourself through others (your sense of otherness). In other words, how much you identified with other people’s behavior growing up, as your ego was forming, and how you interpreted their behavior as either accepting or rejecting chunks of your self-expression.
To Transform Your Life You Must Know Yourself
Your sense of otherness is like a second skin that kicks in every time you interact with the outside world, pulling or pushing you to react in certain ways and unconsciously expecting others to respond according to your internal dynamics. So if you believed you weren’t good enough or didn’t deserve love as a child, you will project your beliefs as an invisible language through your attitudes and expressions, and your reality will reflect that back at you. It’s like having an invisible sign above your head that reads, “I don’t deserve love,” while you keep yearning for it.
Mentally, you expect love and people to behave according to your needs—or how you perceive love—but emotionally, you expect the opposite, because as long as you remain unaware of your patterns, your ego will keep you trapped in a wounded child archetype that feels unloved and believes he or she doesn’t deserve any better. Since your perception is colored by the ego-mind and the creative power of your soul crystallizes your perception, this contradiction will appear in your reality as an unpleasant dynamic of lack of love.
This invisible language is subtle and unconscious; it comes from energetic tendencies you are here to recognize and work on, to evolve and re-align with your true nature. In fact, this is the purpose of growing up in the environment you grew up in and internalizing the dynamics I’ve been talking about. Because you are a spark of Consciousness, and Consciousness is always seeking itself—through you. The more self-aware you become, the purer your ego gets, and the more you realize your divine nature—not as a mental concept, but from the inner silence of no-ego.
Every habit of thought and perception, as well as every action you take, create what I call vibrational seeds (energetic tendencies) that turn into mental and emotional patterns over time, in this and previous lifetimes. They carry the mental and karmic imprints that weave the fabric of your life, leading you through what you’re meant to go through, to continue learning and growing, oftentimes without having much of a choice. Again, you may think you’re making choices as you go, but emotionally you’re simply reacting like a wounded child; the scenery and players may change, but your perception remains colored by past impressions.
In truth, this wounded child archetype is your ego. It takes over, tainting your perception and reality with unresolved issues, time and time again—until you start loving and listening to yourself, to allow your emotional aspects to grow and catch up with who you are now. So start paying attention to how the language of your inner child is reflected in how others treat you, to begin developing emotional freedom and the spiritual awareness to heal, discover your full potential, and live an abundant and empowering soul-guided life!
© 2016 Yol Swan. All rights reserved.