Basic rule of life: It’s all about energy and relationships are a major source of energy exchange. Relationships can either feed our power or drain our power. There’s rarely a middle ground.

Who would you guess are the biggest energy drains in your life?

  • Your Boss
  • Your spouse
  • Your relatives
  • Your co workers

If you said, “all of the above” you’re right.  And unless you are living in the Himalayas, alone, you’re not likely to escape the relationship dance that we engage in daily.          

Before we go any further  know that we draw all relationships to us. Our relationships can be fulfilling or devastating experiences and yet good or bad, they all have the potential to teach us something about ourselves.

Emotional Vampires

Most of us will at one time or another encounter people who seem to suck the life force right out of us, leaving us dazed, angry, tired or exhausted.  Another name for these people would be “Emotional Vampires.”

Different Shapes and Sizes

The Narcissist and Controller are similar because the common theme is me, me and more me. It’s all about their lives or how you should run yours!  In “conversation” with them (and I use that term loosely) it’s really a running monologue of their wins and (very few)  losses in life  or what you need to do to straighten out yours. 

Victim/Martyr/Drama Queen; "Poor me” is the usual unstated but the “read between the lines” message you hear from this combo. Nothing EVER goes right for them and they never act on any good advice offered to them. But they keep coming back for more and more of your help over and over again.

 Let me tell you this; an Emotional  Vampire goes right for your jugular by pressing your most sensitive buttons which leaves you in a weakened state and making you an easy target to drain emotionally.

They can do it overtly or covertly. A covert Vampire will say something like this, “my goodness dear, are you stressed, because I noticed you’ve put on a little weight.” “Bazinga” as Sheldon from Big Bang theory would say. 

In any case, most of us struggle to respond because we’re trying to figure out what the hell just happened. We just know we feel crappy, maybe a little dazed and probably weak.

Plan of Action

  1. Recognize the signs of an Emotional Vampire and if you feel you are in the company of one, metaphorically slap yourself awake, before they get a chance to dig their fangs any farther into your neck.  Alert your personal power center to spring into action and take control. 
  2. Take in a deep breath and straighten your spine, pulling yourself up towards the sky. This will allow your energy to flow through you more easily, giving you more power. Mentally imagine you have a scissor and cut the energy cords that are snaking around and into you.
  1. Next, send them waves of love…yes love. An Emotional Vampire needs lots of it because they are clearly coming from a place of lack. And anyway, remember whatever you send out comes back to you ten-fold!
  2. Now remove yourself from the situation in whatever peaceful way you can.
  3. Finally, when you have a chance to clear your emotional space, ask yourself if this reminds you of other relationships in your life. Is there a common theme? Also, have you ever behaved in this way to others? 

Remember, whatever the outcome, it’s all good because it’s all a learning and growing experience. Live Miraculously!


Michele Landers is a Board Certified Life Purpose Coach, Hypnotherapist, Professional Numerologist and the author of two books: “the Tao of Numbers” and “The Year of Living Miraculously.”   Michele has assisted clients nationwide to gain clarity and direction in their lives. Michele was a recurring coach on Fox/ WFLX   “Eye on South Florida” with Shannon Cake. Reach Michele at

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Comment by Kathy Custren on October 31, 2016 at 11:45pm

Thanks, Michele - we'll end up changing the title to: The Best Ways to Deal with Emotional Vampires ~ It is being forwarded to the publishers  ~ Blessings! 

Comment by Kathy Custren on October 29, 2016 at 10:04pm

Hi, Michele - checking to see if you have your website issues resolved. If so, kindly amend the bio paragraph to include your website rather than your email. Thank you ~ Blessings! 

Comment by Michele Landers on October 19, 2016 at 8:36am

Hi Kathy and thank you for your comments. To address your comments, at the present time my site is down, long story, but I'm doing a teleseminar and somehow my VA could not get the pages and website operating together, so I would say let's hold off publishing this until next week after my site is up and running again and after I have made the advised changes. I will check back with you next week. Fair enough? Thank you so much!

Comment by Kathy Custren on October 19, 2016 at 7:34am

Hi, Michele - Thanks for your submission with its plan of action. One question I have is whether you have a website for people who might want to read more of your work, as opposed to your contact email. We do ask contributors to provide a bio paragraph at the end of each submission of 60 words or less, and the link to your website (or other social media link) would be helpful. 

Also, please keep in mind that we ask writers to write from a we/our standpoint. This would require you to amend the few places where you say, "before I go any further" or "Let me tell you." As readers, we look to you as an expert; you are already telling us. Writing with the 'inclusive we' helps you point out the importance of the message. 

If you would kindly make those brief changes and include your bio, I would be happy to review again and forward your post as an article for consideration to the publishers. Thank you and enjoy your day ~ Blessings! 

OM Times Magazine is a Holistic Green eZine with a Spiritual Self-growth Perspective for the Conscious Community.



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