Many of us go through life believing Empathy is a curse rather than a gift. I sure was one of those many believers, Why? I felt that every time I went out to a public place where a large concentration of people was or if I spoke on the phone with a family member or a friend, watched the news or simply interacted with human beings I genuinely felt I absorbed their negative or toxic energy. At the end of the day whatever I came in contact with I felt it physically, mentally and emotionally.
This went on for years, more years than I can remember or want to for that matter. I holed myself up literally in an isolated corner of my room and did not want to go out or speak to anyone. This of course didn't help because I saw how other people where so happy going about their daily business at the malls, stores and so on. This further pushed me down a spiral of depression, anger and frustration.
Why was this Empathy literally making me so crazily unstable. I searched throughout the web and really only found more more words of discouragement. Something along this line “Empathy is feeling others problems as your own”. This did not make sense, why was I to further absorb peoples negative/toxic energy as mine, I had my own to deal with. I could not understand why we Empaths had to suffer, I sure thought it was a really bad deal we agreed upon prior to incarnating. So I kind of succumbed to the though that empathy was a curse and I was to simply sit still and absorb everyones toxic stuff. I also came to believe this form of self sacrifice would further propel me into enlightenment, sacrifice all my happiness and energy for others.
Nothing was farther from the truth. I believe the first trait light beings develop is Empathy. Think about it how can we help others without a loving heart for all. This gift development is a life lesson on it’s ow. Empathy is a true gift of feeling peoples moods through their energy fields for the sole purpose of assisting them not to take on their issues as ours. It took allot of courage and willingness on my part to differentiate helping someone who wants to be helped vs. wanting to help someone thinking their issues where mine to solve. I literally jumped onto their path and wanted to solve their issues vicariously through them yet ignoring my path at the same time.
I realized my thoughts transformed into actions..when I started mentally saying “I do not accept these energies into my energy field” this meant what it meant, others issues and dramas started to disappear from my daily life. I was still there to help people but not to take on their issues as my own. I had to trust myself when reaffirming or energetically protecting my energy field, you see ego will always try to instill fear in us. So do not be discouraged if the first times you stand up for your energy you achieve it at 50% vs 100%, keep on going and you will get stronger and more confident. I do tell you 50% is better than 0% don’t you think?
We and only we have the power to reject others toxic energies from getting comfortable in our own energy. When I first took this baby step the sense of guilt came over me..I thought to myself “If I shut this person(energy) out and walk away am I no longer a good person?”. Not at all, we are empathic because we are here to help those souls but when they do not want to be helped we must learn to disconnect and move on. Every soul has a purpose, a path and specific life lessons to learn in each lifetime. We may be a small part in their journeys but we are not the navigators on their journey we are our own navigators.
Until you understand this concept and come to the realization that your purpose is to help but not to live other peoples lives, respect their choices wether they align or not with our own preference then you will continuously see yourself going in circles among your own toxic energy and others toxic energy, you will be unable to move as you should on your soul specific path.
Break free from this vicious cycle, each time you find yourself overcome by wordily events, family members, friends or simply people around you simply disconnect from the event or people and re-affirm they are not yours to take on. You can pray, meditate or call upon whom ever you feel comfortable calling upon to assist these events and people and that is all.
First and foremost nurture yourself, love yourself, accept yourself. It is said that we are easily able to see others weaknesses rather than our own. I believe this is true and happily accept that the weaknesses that I see in others are a reflection of my own weaknesses. We must be in love with ourselves to be able to see the love in others regardless of their choices or actions.
Empathy is a true gift accept it with love and joy, use it to heal yourself and others. Be your own divine power at all times, speak your truth, live your truth and be your truth.
About Marcela A. Arrieta
Intuitive Energy Healer, Motivational Speaker and Author Marcela Arrieta uses her natural spark, smile and sense of humor to assist you on your spiritual journey. She is the founder and director of Divine Healing Touch, where her philosophy is Love, Light and Healing. She offers private and group healing sessions, teaches meditation workshops and offers spiritual coaching sessions.