The journey to becoming the best version of ourselves often involves an important detour. A detour in which we must come face-to-face with a person we may not want to meet but need to meet if our journey is to be completed. This person is the lesser version of ourselves who is being impacted by unhealthy and imbalanced ego energy which will block movement forward along our journey including the spiritual portion of it, until we recognize and deal with it.
Have You Met the Lesser Version of Yourself?
What an unpleasant and difficult question to ask and answer for ourselves. Partly, due to its sensitive nature and partly due to the “distractions” of everyday life (work, family, bills, and so on) which keep us at a distance from answering this extremely important question. This is something we may get around to at a future time, if we absolutely have to. Until then it remains filed away near the bottom of one’s “to do” list. Though often ignored the answer to the question is having a significant impact upon our life. Even though we are good, intelligent, and well-meaning people doing the best we can, which also weakens asking the question. The answer is often “weeding” its way into how we interact with people, our closest relationships and ability to love ourselves, achieve our potential and know our life’s purpose, grow the quality of our mind, ability to experience genuine happiness, and deal with the change, adversity, stressors, and conflict that life brings to our door. Ignoring this question often leads us to living a lesser version of ourselves and life. We settle for less than the great life we are meant to live. As Jesus said, “For many are called, but few are chosen.” We fail to choose ourselves when we fail to get to know all of ourselves.
Working on becoming a better person or the best version of ourselves is an often-used approach intended to address the question which titles this article. We often talk about being more open, honest, assertive, sensitive, friendly, responsible, trusting, trustworthy, considerate, mature, supportive, etc. Unfortunately, all too often this is like a New Year’s resolution where the intensions are good but a grasp of the challenges, issues, or influences connected to the resolution are ignored or lacking. Change—real, meaningful, permanent change—requires insight. Insight that allows us to see how, where, and why we are “getting it wrong” in any or many of the life areas mentioned earlier in order to get it right—becoming the best version of ourselves. This involves getting to know a person we don’t want to meet, but need to meet—the lesser version of ourselves.
We have a lot to learn from getting to know this person more intimately, no matter how unpleasant that may be. An opportunity to learn more about “why” we are and not just “what” we are. An opportunity to learn what we can learn in order to become the better version of ourselves and not just thinking what the better version of ourselves looks like. An opportunity to learn about the distance we are living from our spirituality and Divinity. From the perspective of Ego, Spirit & You the search for the lesser version of ourselves and healing involves getting to know our ego energy. Particularly, whether we are experiencing lower or higher ego power, flexibility, or vulnerability. These energies often have us living a lesser and for some the worst version of ourselves. Until we address them, we often remain stuck in who we are no matter how much we want to change. To help things along, The Two Voices Within: Balancing the Energies of Ego and Spirit to Enhance Your Life identifies many roles we can be living in but fail to recognize which are reflective of this energy. Roles in which we are listening much more to the “voice” of ego, than ourselves or Spirit. This is complemented by Ego Therapy: A Method for Healing Your Whole Self and EgoSpiritualism: Awakening to Your Human and Divine Self in which a tremendous amount of light is cast upon ego so that we can heal it where needed and get on with choosing ourselves, being the best version of ourselves, and living the Great Life we are meant to live!
Dr. Nickolas Martin is a licensed psychologist who has worked in clinical, university, public school and private practice settings as a therapist, diagnostician, educator and consultant for 35 years. He authored Ego Therapy: A Method for Healing Your Whole Self and co-authored with Rev. Linda M. Martin, EgoSpiritualism: Awakening to Your Human and Divine Self and The Two Voices Within: Balancing the Energies of Ego and Spirit to Enhance Your Life.