What really overwhelms us in various situations is that we tend to fear that the outcome of our efforts won’t be the way we want it.
And this is the major cause for how we shoot ourselves in the foot.
If we are concentrating too much on the outcome, our thoughts often trigger our subconscious fears.
Such fears have been imprinted in us. We were never born with them. We were born with our innate joy of life and until our subconscious was programmed by our caregivers, our society, belief system, or the spirit of the times we were born in – we had no reason to speculate about such fears.
What’s the remedy for that?
•Forget the outcome. It will be what it will be. You are living your life. You can design it in any way you want – BUT there is always some room for surprises or for improvements made by the process of life itself.
•Instead, concentrate on the task at hand and see it simply as a challenge: challenge yourself to have fun with the task and do the best you can do – because that is the natural thing. Fearing what may or may not be – is not natural to us.
•Slow down and find a way to de-stress. Listen to music for a while, smell the flowers, look at a peaceful landscape – whatever engages your senses in a pleasant way helps you to de-stress. Breathing deeply is another good technique. Or – if there is no time to slow down, use a very simple technique: when a stressful or negative thought comes to mind – shout at it in your mind: STOP! Or put elastic on your wrist and snap it instead. Your brain will quickly learn to associate unwanted thoughts with pain and will avoid them at all cost. It really works like magic.
•Build your self-esteem. You can do it by repeating useful affirmations and reprogramming your subconscious for positive beliefs about yourself. Remember that all success in life starts with accepting our own worth.
•Think of your tasks as if you were playing a game. Make it fun for yourself. Be creative, reach for your childhood memories: remember how you played? How inventive, passionate and joyous you could be? Try to evoke in yourself that lust for life. We don’t need to change circumstances to feel happier. But we definitely need to change our perception of the circumstances. And that is how it works.
•Don’t think about things that you have no control over. It isn’t important how many people apply for the job you want, or if it’s going to rain. These are things you can’t change. What you have control over is your attitude, your performance, your faith in yourself, and how much effort you want to put into whatever it is you’re attempting.
•Be confident about who you are and don’t dwell on what is not who you are. You hold your entire world within you. The world outside only mirrors that world. You create it with your thoughts, whether you are aware of it or not.
•Learn to enjoy what you are experiencing. According to scientists and psychologists – happy people are healthier, both physically and emotionally, live longer, and have much more fulfilling lives than the grumpy, complaining and therefore unhappy, among us. They are eager to challenge themselves and think outside the box. And so – they accomplish much more.
•Whether you reach for the stars, apply for a new job, or climb a mountain, a good thing to ask yourself is: “What is the worst-case scenario?” Once you answer that question you will know that there isn’t any worst-case scenario that could scare you away. We don’t tend to reach for things that are not in our reach. We usually attempt things that are in alignment with our talents, skills, knowledge or expertise.
•Once you have played in your head the worst-case scenario, throw it out of your Mind instantly and focus o the task at hand. Right here, right now, in the present. Focus on what you are doing, and stay with it.
The simple rule is: stay in the present and enjoy the challenge.
No matter what is happening, it’s simply an experience that you have decided to have. And, again, the more fun you have with it, the more fun you get from it.
•Remind yourself that this is just another opportunity. If this one doesn’t work, there always will be more. Life is a stream of opportunities. And each of them is just an experience.
•Open your heart. Look inside to find out what you truly want and need to bring to the world. Then go for it.
You are unique, and your life journey is unique.
Once you find what’s in your heart, nothing is impossible for you.
About the author: Johanna Kern is a transformational teacher and multiple award-winning author of “365 (+1) Affirmations to Create A Great Life”, “Secrets of Love for Everyone”, “Master and the Green-Eyed Hope”, etc. She practices and shares the Master Teachings of HOPE, helping people to find their own power and progress in all areas of life. Her story received international attention, winning praise by readers in North America and Europe, and endorsement by three world-renowned experts: Stanley Krippner, Ph.D., Jerry Solfvin, Ph.D., and Brian Van der Horst.