The Devil card- time for revaluation…
The watchful retrograde Mercury,
I am chained to this loop with no soulful imagination,
A loop of my bondage to the material world,
Makeup, mushrooms, meditational orgasms.
A spring-night, full-moon-madness and rituals of fertility,
Dreams of life vivid and complicated,
The dualities merged in an amniotic tranquillity,
The thirst is eternity wrapped in a bubble,
Awakened to a mind-palace eerie, screeches of hostility.
Sights and sound blend into dimensional warps,
The Moon up above is as shiny as the silvery moon inside,
A completion, my own womb in unity with the Universal spark.
Like the Ouroboros emblematic of the unconscious.
Alive, alive, alive!
The gnawing sense of loss, the saga of separation,
From you my Time Traveller!
There is a song that keeps playing inside of my imagination,
Have you heard that frequency in 4D?
You made this track, I remember…you’re no amateur.
There are infinite vortices in frequencies we cannot access,
But in my right eye,
There is a time machine.
To ferry us to oblivion to confess and invest..
In the need of one another, joined in yabyum.
For what need is there my TRAVELLER..
For this separation…
The inevitability of the dew of my soul drying up with the harsh Sun of reality…
Seems to me that you’re sucking me through this sound…
Into a parallel Tree(of life).
Like the Emperor you sit.
Were you not the Fool?
Beginning your journey new.
A whole new vista, waiting to get drunk with newness.
From the ambrosial vulva of creation.
Were you not Death?
You time jumped into the pupils of my eyes.
The perpetual movement of cycles of breath.
Eternally waiting for the final Metomorphosis.
So much angst, so much suffering for greater clarity and depth.
Were you not the Temperance, Strength and the Hanged Man?
There was a point in time when it all began.
A time of loops and time warps.
A tantalising bizarre parody.
Of fake moral fortitude, repeating incessantly, in a loop- YES I CAN.
In my mind there is only one tune that plays…
Creepy…it takes me to a place of fear…
A willing choice to push every sound away.
My heartbeat is intense in its rapidity,
It’s unsettling…this whoosh, whoosh.
The poignancy of The Star reversed.
This wistful feeling of familiarity with this frequency,
Of the track you are playing in my mind, cursed and pierced.
Or are you stealing the tune away in lunacy?
Are we time travellers caught in a loop of sound?
On this dimension to learn soul lessons?
Do we even exist outside of our heads?
I see you standing on the white shores of nowhere…it beckons…
The endless bustling sea, grey, dark and almost menacing.
Are you listening to my thoughts?
For you are aware of the sound of my soul.
My mind talk, the intricacy of my mindpalace where I store a million memories…
The bitter sweetness of this fragmented whole.
A life never lived.
A space never shared.
The ambiguity of it all…the nothingness, the absurdism of this madness and mayhem…
My TIME TRAVELLER, there is no return for you or me,
Back to the loop, back to the grind.
The Chariot will take us there and mix dreams with nightmares.
Mythical, mastery of conflicted issues…our journey into the netherworld of Innana.
Ishtar journeys through the darkest reaches of the underworld to bring her brand of love and warfare.
The Sun is on the horizon,
The child smiles at me, a smile of promises brightened.
A smile to break the loop with innocence.
Invasive is this life, cruel and like the Hermit I retreat.
I was that child not so long ago.
Where did I lose those days, moments, seconds and silences?
TIME TRAVELLER, I know you exist.
Why do you not reveal yourself in this 3D reality?
You can slip back into your black hole anytime you want.
You know how to close this leaking time drift.
The Ace of Cups…a new beginning…in life..
A renewal of emotions, a complete PURGE.
I wear vulnerability like makeup,
I open my whole self to your magic TIME TRAVELLER.
For once I awaken and take charge.
I know you come to meet me through the music.
I know of the loops now and of the portals.
Of the silent sound you put in my head.
My hypothesis…it is the only faint memory my unconscious knows.
Will I ever cross these insurmountable hurdles?
Like the Page of Wands, enthusiastic Time Loop Ventures.
A thousand shards of cosmic glass splatters in my heart,
It’s the Three of Swords- the SEPARATION and the misadventure.
Traveller melt away this 3D dense reality.
DELETE and let us move into 5D awareness…
This sound of the bass and the interdimensional warp.
I hunt for the Four of Wands…the final atonement.
The shadow caught in the quagmire.
All these moments are fleeting and cannot be caught and photographed either.
They are like the dual slit experiment.
Will this life be a wave or a particle?
Every season, every sunrise, every bird song, every new moon…
You cannot box them or can you Traveller?
Do you have technology to freeze the moment and take a 3D print?
4D print of the temporary nothingness of a moment.
I can hear my own heartbeat in your song.
Was it yours to begin with?
Or did you steal it somewhere on the way?
Traveller I do not remember who you are.
You’re just a face I see around.
The face distorts into a thousand faces,
Sometimes it screams like a ghoulish nightmare.
There is a certain frustration to this process.
How do I tell the faces apart?
How do I remember your face Traveller?
The Lovers pop up. In naked embrace.
I want you Traveller now more than ever.
Seems like I’ve been listening to your whispers for eternity.
The Dark surrounds us, the cosmic warp of all dimensions.
Merging and melting, dying and being reborn.
Every single cell of the body,
To the hugest quasars in space.
The Tower is the only vague memory I have.
And that pitch, that sound, that frequency.
Is this dream coming to an end?
Is the final wakeup call here?
That melancholic synchronicity, that tune ringing in the background.
That song is your Traveller.
That joy is you.
But, but, but…there is always a choice involved.
The Magician is you with control over time and space.
You use your tools of higher intuitive forces.
You create MAGIC Traveller.
In my waking life, there is no YOU Traveller.
You are the Great Void.
I am your High Priestess, my Magician.
I am the alaya of your soul…
I waited for eternity with all these words.
To lay them out before you, like a perfect spread.
All signifying the signifier and meaning is lost forever.
Five of Wands energy controls this loop.
The sickening competitive spirit alive and kicking in all areas of the human condition.
Trees, birds, animals, humans, bloody and gory- slain.
Blood and guts, hacked limbs, bones and cartilage, dismembered animals on plates of devastation.
Are you standing still at my pain?
The Eight of Swords- tension, turbulence, terrorism.
But change is in my hands Traveller.
Yet I refuse it. I renounce it. I ridicule it.
The polarities in me divergent- what of this schism?
The Judgement. Maat weighing my soul against her feather of truth.
Will I survive Traveller? Or meld away into darkness?
Will I be able to cross the bridge into the 5D reality?
The secrets are there…in MSS, in that sound you created.
Like Shiva who brought forth AUM into existence.
You are a Shiva of my own creation Traveller.
The days tick by and life drags on.
You don’t exist in my world. You never did.
For you exist in my mind and my heart.
My yang waiting to be coalesce into your yin.