Change is all around. The world is changing as a whole, as we all are simultaneously changing individually. For us, this relates to work, family, economy, health, success and the like. Change is often wanted, yet it frightens us. Why is that? Because nothing seems more safe and comfortable than in the cocoon - transitioning to a beautiful butterfly is attractive, yet a bit scary.
Thankfully, we live in a time where we are both allowed and encouraged to fulfill our needs and achieve our goals. This has led to a constant flow of always wanting better for ourselves. This phenomenon has both its pros and cons. The possibility to create more happiness for ourselves is obviously positive. But at the same time, we must be careful not to want change just for the change itself. We could always make more money, eat healthier, work out more, and look better. If we get stuck in this never-ending flow, we will never be happy where we are. Our happiness will always linger somewhere in the future.
Follow these two steps to make the transition from cocoon to butterfly;
1. Don’t change just for the change itself. Prioritize.
Ask yourself; what are you the most happy with in your life right now? Put a smiley face next to it, and leave it like this. Applaud yourself for a job well done.
Then ask yourself; if you were to change just one thing that would improve your life quality the most, that you really want, what specifically would that be? Keep your focus on this aspect for now. People easily get overwhelmed with too many projects at once. One step at a time!
2. When you have figured your true desire, think about why you haven’t already gone through with it.
This is one of the major reasons why people fail along the road; we will always lose something by changing something. Spare time, the comfort of eating junk food, the softness of the coach after a long day’s work, the compassion from others by staying in the victim role… The truth is, change acquires work. Change acquires energy. Change acquires consistency. Do not fear, it is absolutely possible to succeed in changing despite for this. But if we don’t identify what we are going to lose, and prepare for it, it will most likely happen unconsciously and pull us back towards old, comfortable patterns. So what to do?
Think about what you will lose by doing what the change acquires. Is it spare time? Family time? Money? Comfort? There is always something. When you have identified your possible loss, there are two options. Sometimes it is enough to be prepared for it and weigh the loss against the future gain. Other times, it is best to find alternative methods to take care of the aspects we are afraid to lose. For example, if the change will acquire time usually spent with the family, we can plan a family vacation to make up for it. If we are losing weight and miss the junk food, we can find recipes with healthier snacks to replace it.
It all comes down to how much we want it. When we find something we really desire, and identify and accept what we will have to scarify along the way, success is truly ours to come. We just have to remember to support ourselves in new ways as we go.
About the author:
As a certified coach with an educational background in Sociology, Change Management and NLP, Anne Mari Ramsdal aims to help people wake up to their true Being through writing, speaking and coaching, She also loves helping groups and organizations become more successful.