Abstract: Ready or not, our kids are going to change our lives A LOT! As we strive to guide and teach our kids the best we can, we bring to focus our own need to guide and teach ourselves! What if we could parent from a different perspective? What if we knew that we already have all we need to be a good parent? Tips on making parenting easier and more enjoyable.
“When you get really clear and honest with yourself about what you want, everything in the universe conspires with you to help you get it. There is a catch. You are going to have to let it be easier that you think, faster that you expect and more fun than you can imagine.” Michael Neill
As we welcome children into the world, we stand in awe of the journey that we are embarking on. Ready or not, these kids are going to change our lives A LOT! As we strive to guide and teach our kids the best we can, we bring to focus our own need to guide and teach ourselves! If we look outside to find our way, we often find ourselves confused, stressed, and tired of trying to live up to how we think we “should be” parenting our kids. What if we could parent from a different perspective? What if we knew that we already have all we need to be a good parent? What if we could make parenting easier than most people think?
Yoko Munakata, professor of developmental psychology and neuroscience, tells a new story about parents’ role in their children’s future. One of her comments is, “predicting how our kids turn out based on our parenting is as likely as predicting the course of a hurricane.” Science is confirming that parenting is not the main force in shaping who our kids become. As we change our thinking, we acknowledge that every child in the world is different. They each have their own innate abilities and paths to find their way, discovering who they are and what they want in their lives. We can support our kids by stopping any judging or shaming of ourselves for not being able to control their lives. We definitely have influence on our kids, while letting go of having to be the greatest force in the process. Having this understanding makes our journey of parenthood a lot easier, and supports our kids in feeling free to be who they are!
We can support ourselves in making parenting easier and more enjoyable when we…
Ask the question, “What is the nature of experiencing the most beneficial, loving, nurturing and empowering journey of parenting our kids?”
Embrace the science that is showing that we are all one and connected with the same loving source and universal intelligence. As paradigm shifting is changing our lives, we become more aware of the co-creative interplay we have with our source and it’s universal intelligence. We expand our consciousness as we discover better ways of using our thinking and feeling. As we fully grasp the ramification of this, we wake ourselves up to making the journey of parenthood life easier and more enjoyable.
Acknowledge that our children’s bodies and souls have been shaped and guided by the same source and universal intelligence that created us! Does it make sense to us that when they emerged into the world, they still had access to that same intelligence and guidance? Does it also make sense that, we too, still have the same universal intelligence and guidance available to us? What if we relax into knowing that we both have access to that same intelligence and guidance?
Look inside to find the answers that we need. Instead of looking outside for techniques, opinions and rules on the “right way” to parent, we can draw from what we already have inside of us. We can explore, discover and experience what it means to guide our kids from our inside out. With the understanding that we have all the guidance we need, we can trust ourselves to grow loving, trusting and harmonious connections with our kids. We make our lives (and theirs!) so much easier. As Jack Pransky, well known author of Parenting From the Heart, says “parenting this way makes parenting a true pleasure instead of a battle.”
Move! Movement is a fun and important part of our lives. Breathe, dance, walk, swim, express, shake and vibrate! Breathe, allow oxygen to flow through our veins and release where we have been holding back. Movement opens us up to shift our energy, creating uplifting moods that kids love…and want to join in with!
Appreciate our miraculous ability to experience that we exist, the ability to taste, see, hear, touch and feel. The gift of intuition and guidance that supports us in staying on track… and alerting us when we start veering off. The gift of knowing when our channels are open, receiving and enjoying our lives. Letting us know when we are stagnant, stuck and in need of an auto-correction back to our innate sense of wellness, love, creativity and ease. The gift of being able to experience who we truly are and the unlimited possibilities that are always available to us and our kids.
Notice and embrace our ways of thinking. Explore and discover the true nature of our thinking. Are we using our thinking for co-creating the experiences we want for ourselves and our kids? Or are we filling our minds with cluttered thinking that draws us into shallow breathing, contraction, stress and uncomfortable moods. What if we clear our minds of obsessive thinking? What if we open the space for having wonderful insights, guidance and light hearted moods! We can do it!
Withdraw from the need to control ourselves and our kids. Ann Wilson Schaef, author of “When Society Becomes an Addict," reminds us that “not only does our society invite addiction, it requires addiction to tolerate the society we have created.” Change happens in miraculous ways if we let it. With all our good intentions, we sometimes find ourselves becoming part of the problem, engaging in our old controlling and addictive ways of thinking, feeling and behaving. What if we get honest with ourselves, and listen to the voice inside that is telling us that we are lying to ourselves as a way to tolerate our lives, control our kids and keep up with cultural ways of dealing with our feelings of stress and powerlessness.”
Bring forth a new way of living. Explore and discover new ways of living. Cultivate relationships and communities that are based in connection and remembering that well being is not something we can get or lose, nor is it something that comes and goes. Create compassionate space for ourselves and others to have fulfilling lives, knowing that all the support we need is always there. Guide and teach our kids in understanding the nature of their innate creativity, wellness and ability to bring forth new possibilities…focusing on their strengths and what they love to do. Bring understanding to them that they are never alone and always have access to love and guidance. Enhance their understanding with experiences such as pointing out that the sun is always there for us day and night…and when the clouds pass by and the morning comes… they see that sun is always there for them…just as their source is always there! We can point out how the cuts and scrapes they clean and put bandaids on, miraculously heal. How seeds turn into flowers, eggs into birds and all the other amazing creations that life keeps giving us.
Embrace our journey of parenthood with all it’s highs, lows and everything between. Release ourselves from the thinking that our experiences with our kids are either good, bad, right or wrong. Embrace our experiences, knowing that some feel good…and some may be laden with misunderstanding, frustration and chaos! Let these experiences pass by, knowing that better ideas and experiences are not far behind. Remember that movement and compassion make the process go faster!
“Our consciousness is always making new forms of manifestation. As one sensation and manifestation leaves, a new one arises.”- Steven Handel
About the author:
Crystal is an author, multidimensional coach and facilitator for the live event called Freedom at the Core. She is the instructor and coach for her online course, Freedom From the Inside Out. She draws from her own experience and the experience of the thousands of people she has worked with over the past 35 years. Crystal is known for the fun and empowering way she supports people in bringing forth the experiences they want in their lives. Currently she is coaching parents and kids while writing a series of children's books that embrace the principles of Freedom at the Core/Freedom From the Inside Out.