At the moment we decide to be born into this life, we choose, yes, choose who are parents will be. This is a concept that is resonate with some and ridiculous to others, but it benefits us to consider it as a possibility for a number of reasons.
Whatever problems we feel we've incurred by the intervention of our parents, the reality is that there's not a soul among us who can say that our strength and our character did not come from what we've gained from our experiences with them. We needed them to guide us though this maze of human existence to learn and grow with the lessons we'd chosen to study while in this life. We all have some unpleasant memories of our parents. It is because we are all human. Yes, even them. When we resent them or blame them for our lives, what we are doing is deciding that we are too weak to develop our own characters utilizing the best way we can based on the informtion we've been given. This attitude taints the spirit and attracts negative energy into every aspect of your life. You were born to your parents, you have inherited a collection of genes from them, but thats it. Biologically, you have inherited their genes, but your spirit is completely yours. You are not them. To believe this is to suggest that you are not a person of completeness or of free will. This is not the intention of the universe.
Those that had a wonderful relationship with our parents, the blessings are obvious, and the reality is that we decided that family turmoil was not a lesson we needed to learn from in this life, and therefore our parents were chosen to guide us through other adventures toward our spiritual growth.
As time goes by, we see them differently. We see them as human, we see them change, we see them grow as a result of our presence in their lives. They have just as much to learn from us as we do from them, only it is not as obvious to us the role we play in their lives until we ourselves are older and wiser. We see how we've opened their eyes to certain things, how we've helped them discover further who they are as a result of having to have cared for us all of our lives. Those of us who are parents ourselves get to watch them interact with our children in a way that is sometimes foreign to us. They become wiser and many of the anxieties surrounding raising a child become muted once they realize what a bang up job they did with us and that the universe is always at work in our growth and wellbeing. Each generation gets a chance to benefit from the wisdom of that understanding. It really is a beautiful process.
When we think of happy memories of our parents the most beautiful ones usually involve some type of "interaction", and usually happen when we are very young. Playing in the yard, piling in the car on a Friday night and going out for ice cream, you and your siblings getting viciously tickled by your dad, standing on a chair and watching your mom cook or just being read the same bedtime story for the nine millionth time. ( The more unfavorable memories are usually come later, when adolescence takes over our brains. )
Our parents deserve a large note of gratitude. They have shaped us in a way that we will never truely understand. They have sacrificed and given us all they could within their power using the resources and knowledge that they had. They forgot who they were a long time ago in order to help to shape you into the person you have become.
Be grateful for the time you had with your parents, and if you are lucky enough be grateful for the time you still have... and try to give them a break. You were no walk in the park.