“Out of suffering have emerged the strongest Souls; the most massive
characters are seared with scars.”
– Khalil Gibran
We all go through the Dark Night of the Soul but the subsequent awakening is the reward only to those who dare to move towards the unknown and trust the move.
When I was going through the dark-night I didn’t have any idea that I was into it and to top that, I was so deeply depressed with my life as I wasn’t living my authentic-self, that it didn’t help. With the first spiritual awakening suddenly, in a flash my life became clear and I understood why the 8+ years have been difficult, why I was into the deep dark period of depression, when everything was difficult, unattainable.
The irony here is with most of us even if the circumstances are different and we are living a completely different life dark-night is always disruptive of everything that we “think” we hold dear or we “think” we have built. And since the emotional and mental effects of a dark-night is so intense that we keep seeking help from doctors, counsellors, therapists, healers, but if we’re not “learning” and our “wisdom” isn’t expanding during this period then no solution can come to our rescue.
That inner-shift and probably that physical change that our life needs, we as a Soul need; if it’s not taken care of which in many cases people don’t then their dark-night never ends. Which is why you will see many people talking about the “Saturn Return” never ending in their life.
One of my many experiences during my dark-night were with people and situationships created. I was working as a freelancer in New York and this one center had an employee who took a dislike to me without any reason, she was jealous and very rude too. I soon became popular, and just after a few months, I discovered that she had been tricking my clients by telling them my services weren’t good enough, and that others’ & her own services were better. I was deeply hurt, and that whole week became a disaster for me.
That’s when a very good friend of mine asked me, why wasn’t I “learning” from the situation, and wasn’t even practicing what I was preaching. That made me sit up and take notice. In my mind I didn’t do “wrong” to this person in thought or behavior so I kept asking why so much hatred will she have towards me, forgetting the lessons. That was a big turning point in my dark-night period, as if it was a much awaited inner-shift that took place the day Miriam asked me the “why”. I didn’t only release this karmic burden initiated by someone else but I also understood that I don’t have to know their reasons, but only have to let go of the situation knowing that our soul-contract initiated this exchange and that she took some of my karmic burden.
From that day onwards I became more aware, more conscious of my thoughts and feelings as if a door that was closed had opened and soon after I went to Vipassana, which helped me further with my first awakening.
Keeping in mind that we all are different individuals with different karmic-contracts, soul-contracts, and that both the dark-night and awakening are disruptive forces, chaotic forces to uproot whatever we believed in to activate a new belief-system in us, with “meditation and “visualization”, “yoga”, “journaling” being the best practices, I am sharing with my experience these 7 survival-tactics that will make the time easier but will also help us in bringing all the power of our practices into everyday life so the time is over faster and that the awakening is smooth too,
I want to be clear here, that by saying “finding good” in the situation, I am not propagating
bypassing what we felt -sadness, anger, rage, as our intention isn’t to judge or justify.
We are accepting our feelings and acknowledging them, but we’re also not giving our
power away to anybody or any situation.
As I let go and started to change myself, awakening happened fast, there was clarity and semblance to my life. The shift is inevitable and nobody can stop it, so resisting it is a
preposterous dream. The best way is to flow with life and whatever it brings. Days are easier
that way and there are promises of good too.
If a person creates heightened sensitivity in a negative way or you feel uneasy because with their “good talks” they seem to tear you down, they aren’t supporting you in any way but always telling you how wrong you are. Don’t even think of giving them a chance, maybe when your dark night is over. But now is your time to protect yourself and build yourself up. Do just that!!!!
This traumatic period wasn’t the same as dark-night and I could see how the energy-vampire was sucking my energy through negative magic, but wasn’t able to do anything for at least 15 days. And if we aren’t careful and don’t apply all our lessons, the Universe will keep throwing curve-balls to make us understand. It was a difficult period but a much-required eye-opener.
And this period is about “detachment” from wanting “validations” from others, its’ about developing that self-love which comes from the understanding of self and how we as a human operate. Shunning oneself becomes one strong veil that needs to be healed. And the first step towards that is stop being “mean” to yourself and this one act helps in not let anyone manipulate us into thinking “less” about our-self.
So, we may find that we don’t gel with people with whom we earlier used to, and it becomes frustrating and even chaotic when they want our earlier version or keep making fun & undermining our feelings and experiences. Which is why you will see most of the people going through this period experience “loneliness” and there’s an understanding about it in the later stages, but when it starts it’s bewildering and confusing. The best way is to become your own best-friend and support yourself, talk to yourself as every bff would.
This not only is for the sake of healing the feeling of loneliness but is highly therapeutic to our nervous-system thus growing our emotions and making us emotionally mature.
I hope my experiences may give you more clarity to tread the challenging period, making it more enjoyable and knowing that it too shall pass. May you remain blessed.