Cutting the energetic cord: Why it doesn’t always work

Have you ever felt as if you haven't quite moved on from an ex, even months after you have broken up? You have done all the right things: Physically disconnected by throwing out all the little mementos of him and emotionally disconnected after a significant period of time, healing, wine and chocolate! But still you feel connected to them although you know that you won’t be going back to them.  So, what's going on? Well, it sounds as if you have not cut the energetic cord between yourself and the ex.  But think carefully before you cut that energetic cord.  The process is not as simple as it is often made out to be.

An energetic cord is an invisible thread, transmitting energy between you and another person.  Throughout your lifetime you will form many energetic cords, connecting energetically with each person that you come into contact with.  The majority of these cords will dissolve naturally once you have disconnected from the other person.  However, when we connect with someone on an intimate level the energetic connection may be exceptionally strong, making it difficult to simply walk away from that person without a second thought.  This is partly the reason that many psychics and healers will suggest that you cut the energetic cord once you have made the decision to move on.  This is because it allows both parties the freedom and energy each needs to move on completely.  Sometimes cord cutting simply doesn’t work.  As opposed to being a permanent disconnection of energy, the result of cord cutting is more of a temporary, rendering one or both parties hopeless to moving on.

The main reason that cord cutting doesn’t work is because you have not identified or dealt with the weakness that attracted you to your ex lover in the first place.  You need to identify those negative patterns, thoughts and behaviours that were apparent in your relationship.  Not just theirs but yours too.  These negative patterns, thoughts and behaviours may include: jealousy, fear of abandonment, rage, insecurity, fear of being alone….the list is endless and it may go as far back to your own childhood.  But until you know what those patterns, thoughts and behaviours are all cord cutting will do is put you in a position where you are attracting similar men to your ex.  In the end what will happen is that you will find yourself in a similar relationship to your last, just with a different person or your ex if you choose to take them back.  This is because cutting the cords disconnects your energy it doesn’t deal with the root of the problem, making it akin to sticking a band aid over the problem and hoping it will go away. 

So, how do you go about identifying your negative patterns, thoughts and behaviours?  Here are 3 possible suggestions which, if utilised, will help you to overcome the negativity and cut those energetic cords:


  1. Go it alone because the answers lie within

Often in life you know where you are going wrong but try to ignore it, burying it deep within in the hope that it will not see the light of day.  The problem here is that what we try to keep in the dark often has a habit of resurfacing to see the light of day.  But knowing this is good because it is exactly these thoughts, patterns and behaviours that you will need to address if you want cord cutting to work.  Through meditation and connecting with your guides or the angelic realm you can ask to be shown what you need to work on in order to move on and cut the energetic cord between you and your ex.  However, to do this takes a lot of spiritual strength, courage and a strong connection with the spiritual realm.  But by going within it is wholly possible to find the answers to the question that you seek.

  1. Consult a psychic

Psychic tarot readings have become about more than just validation and prediction, with many seeking out psychics in order to be guided on the next part of their journey.  When used in this way a psychic reading can become a powerful tool that empowers you to become the best version of yourself and move your life forward in a positive direction.  By working with a psychic tarot reader who you trust you can gain insight into your shadow self, with the reader delving into your past and previous relationships in order to uncover those aspects of yourself that need to be brought in to light.  In uncovering this, the reader can provide you with the guidance that you need to overcome this making the process cord cutting much more effective.


3. Healing

Healing modalities, such as Reiki and Angelic Reiki may be an appropriate form of healing to use in order to begin the process of dissolving those negative thoughts, behaviours and attitudes that no longer serve your Highest good.  Angelic Reiki, for example, involves working with high Angelic Vibrations, with the practitioner channelling energy from the Divine.  Therefore those thought-forms and attitudes, that are not in alignment with the Divine, come to the forefront for healing.  This begins that process of empowering the recipient to begin that journey of letting go.

Although this article discusses energetic cords and cord cutting from the perspective of love, it's important to remember that you form energetic cords with strangers, family members, colleagues and bosses. All of these energetic cords can have a negative effect on you leaving you feeling drained, angry, sad or resentful. Therefore it's important to listen to your body as this is where the energy manifests itself. So taking the time to clear and protect your energy on a daily basis should be your first point of action before resorting to cord cutting.  But that’s another discussion.


Chanel is an Angelic Reiki practitioner/teacher.  She is also an intuitive card reader specialising in giving guidance in the areas of love & relationships, career and business. Her intention is to empower others to become the best possible version of themselves. To find out more about her and her work please visit: 

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