Setting Healthy Boundaries to Enhance Our Spiritual Growth
By Judi Lynch
(Article Submission for March 2021)
Word count – 763
Bio word count - 60
Throughout our lives we learn how important setting boundaries are in relation to our spiritual health and well-being. When we are able to define and love ourselves as we are evolving, we can learn to protect ourselves and respect our energy levels. When we agree to things we really shouldn’t or truly don’t want to do we drain our energy. We have to learn to say no when it’s appropriate. There will always be other times when there is an emergency or a situation where we are ready and happy to assist.
When we find ourselves saying yes to make others happy, we may be allowing ourselves to be manipulated because of our good nature. We can still care and be supportive of others but we have to make it clear that respect is deeply important. We have to ground ourselves in calmness to allow ourselves to speak clearly and confidently about our feelings. We have to respect ourselves enough to understand that it’s okay to say ‘NO.’ It’s okay to ask someone not to speak to you in a negative or unkind manner. It’s okay to end a manipulative friendship if necessary. We can learn to release the need to be right, to be liked by everyone, etc. When we do, we are free.
Boundaries also means to keep personal life information for those we trust. It isn’t really necessary for us to share our whole life story with people we barely know. It can leave us feeling vulnerable and drained afterwards. The culture that we are living in can be very judgmental and unforgiving. Oversharing can lead to unnecessary anxiety and even depression.
Some people are not going to like it if you speak your truth and that’s okay, too. If you can articulate your wishes and thoughts clearly and peacefully, it will help keep the situation calm. If it makes someone angry, maybe they really needed to hear someone else’s view of their actions.
It can be challenging to be in the presence of others who have stressful personality traits. For example, extreme narcissists do not practice healthy boundaries. Lacking empathy, they have a strong sense of entitlement to exploit others. Boundaries can help to stop them from having an effect on your energy. We can all have narcissistic traits that we deal with through life. Most of us learn as we go and strive to make changes when we feel we can do better. There are many people who go through life with or without understanding how their behavior affects others and have no desire to change.
Tips for Dealing with a Narcissistic or Difficult Personality
Accept them as they are
Set boundaries to make it clear what is unacceptable behavior
Speak your truth peacefully and calmly
Expect reaction to your truth
Remember the truth as you lived it
Find support from others
Don't lower your energy to their level or feed their ego just to make peace
Don't take responsibility for their emotions
Narcissists can be very dramatic and charming. They are exceptional at creating a magical self-image that gains attention. We become attracted by their seeming to have it all in control. We can give them too much of our power, lose ourselves in the process. They need our admiration to survive and they thrive on the energy it brings in. Narcissists thrive on collecting fans. Unconditional love for others is not in their vocabulary. When they cease to get the control and power that they need, they lose interest, even turning angry, blaming others to why things didn’t work out.
It can also be challenging to deal with others who play the ‘victim’ at every opportunity, they are constantly complaining but never take steps to change their situation. Our energy gets hijacked from listening and trying to offer solutions that will never be applied. They have learned how to gain attention and energy by playing on our empathy and sensitive nature.
We are not responsible to ‘fix’ everyone, enable them or tell them it is okay to be emotionally abusive because that’s ‘just how they are.’ There are also capable professionals out there who work with people on narcissism and other personality challenges. They assist those who are coming into awareness of the basis for their need to control and manipulate, wanting to work on their life and spiritual skills.
Setting boundaries protects our life missions here, helping our physical, emotional, mental and spiritual bodies, helping us set a course for success in our endeavors.
About the Author:
Judi Lynch is a psychic medium, intuitive counselor, healing channel and author. She is president of the Crystal Healing Foundation, Inc. a 501(c) spiritual charity and writer for OM Times Magazine. She has authored two books, Friends with Lights and Conscious Ascension and has read for clients all over the world. To learn more or contact for a session see judilynch.com
Article description: Setting boundaries protects our life missions here, helping our physical, emotional, mental and spiritual bodies, helping us set a course for success in our endeavors.